As usual, Dad's face was hiding behind a newspaper when I got to the dining table. Uncle Liam had started serving and all I had to do was to eat. All the little talk before eating wasn't necessary. I sat down and served myself then dug into my meal. It was rice, mutton stew with orange juice. Not the greatest meal but who cares. I was famished and I wasn't talking to anybody and everybody.
The moment Uncle Liam left, I heard the paper rustling as Dad placed it on the table and felt his eyes on me. I kept my head down and kept eating like it was the most important thing in the world. I was so tense and waiting for him to say something but then I heard the sound of a fork clinking against a plate. I felt relief wash over me immediately. Unlike Mum who talks in the middle of a meal, Dad hardly says a word while eating. Now all I had to do was finish up and get out of the room before he did. That way, no talk would happen.
I did a short work of my meal and gulped down a whole cup of orange juice. Apart from the sweetness of that juice, I honestly couldn't remember the taste of everything else. I stood up and was going to hurry out of the room but was given an immediate order to "Stop!" And "Sit!" As if he was talking to a dog.
A chill went down my spine when he gave those orders because his voice was so stern and brimming with restrained anger. I slowly returned to my seat with my heart going wild. It's one thing for Dad to transfer his aggression to me but when he is angry with me, it's a totally new ball game. Just like he doesn't hesitate to give, he also doesn't hesitate to take. I have seen him do that to Daniel several times. But no matter how I think about it, there was nothing he could take from me. If he takes the car, it simply means, I wouldn't have to go to the shop again. That was fine by me. Uncle Liam already said it's okay for Slyvester to come to the house. If he freezes my account, so what? I hardly spend my own money and by the time school opens, he will release it. That never lasts. The only thing he could take from me was my admission to NewYork. If he dares stop that, I wouldn't know what to do but one thing was sure, nobody in this family was going to stop me from leaving. As I thought of the possibility of him stopping me from schooling in NewYork because of last night, fear mixed with anger roused up inside me. I had to focus on my breathing so I could calm down.
And just like that, I waited for more than 10 mins for Dad to finish his meal while I stew in uncertainty, fear and anger.
"Caitlin!" He snapped, making me jump. My mind had wandered off while planning my next move in case my greatest fears came to life. He must have called my name repeatedly before shouting like that. I looked up warily at him and met the anger in his eyes. It wasn't as dark as I expected. In fact it was mixed with worry.
"Yes dad."
"What's wrong with you?! You went out again without your tracker!"
"I…" I was completely thrown off because I was expecting something stronger than the soft, angry but worried voice I was hearing. So I didn't know how to respond.
"Look, it's for your own safety. You will soon leave the house. Once you do, you are on your own. If you can't take good care of yourself now, what will happen once you are in New York?"
"I am sorry Dad." I heaved.
What choice did I have? The man was so patronizing and had taken the wind out of my sail the instant he opened his mouth.
"From henceforth, always wear your tracker. Even when you are inside the house. That way you will get used to it again."
What?! Wear my tracker everyday? Why?!
"But I am not a celebrity anymore, Dad." I replied with a stammering voice. And he chuckled.
"No. You are not. You are more than a celebrity. You are the heir to one of the biggest multi-million empires in America. The only daughter of Daniel Woods."
I stared at him incredulously. Why was he fanning his own ego? What was the big deal about being his daughter? He must have heard my thoughts because he snickered and shook his head. "Caitlin, You are a living and breathing target for kidnapping. Especially outside Arizona. NewYork is nothing but a big slum. A criminals' haven. This is why we didn't want you to go there. Our influence in NewYork is not as strong as here. You have to wear your tracker everyday once you get there."
"Okay Dad." I replied because there was really nothing to say. I can't argue after the facts.
"About yesterday. I know you will have questions. You can ask me anything, " he said after some time.
"I… I can?" I repeated in shock. I honestly thought he wouldn't want to talk about it.
At that moment my mind went blank. I discovered that I had no question to ask. I already had more than the answers he would be willing to give. Except for one. And even that one, I lacked the courage to ask it. So I shrugged and started wishing there was still food in front of me to play with.
"I don't have any questions. What I have is a request." I said, staring at him.
"Request away." He said with a gruff.
"Can..can I call off my engagement" I asked cautiously.
"What?! Why?" he sat up in his chair, sounding serious now.
"I don't think I love him anymore. I don't want to marry him anymore." I broke down. Totally unnerved by my own outburst, I placed my head on the table and cried. I heard him stand up and walk over to me. I felt him gather me into his arms while kneeling by my chair.
That's my Dad for you. Always nagging and cranky but can't stand a single teardrop.
"Stop crying and talk to me." He tenderly said as he rubbed my back. I cried harder and he let me. He kept rubbing my back and whispering to me that "everything will be okay."
After some time, I eased up and withdrew from his embrace. ."Thanks dad." I sniffed.
He dragged the chair nearest to him closer to me and sat in it. "Now tell me why you want to call off your engagement." He said with all seriousness.
"Riley has been cheating on me since grade 10 with Sarah. There are rumors that they are still seeing each other despite all his promises to break up with her."
"Oh!" Dad said. He didn't sound surprised or angry. He sounded like he knew… " I thought you were okay with it. " He said.
Okay with what?
"Dad? How can you say that? How can I be okay with my man cheating on me with another woman? Not just one. Many!"
To my indignation, he just heaved out. "I wish I could help you with that but I can't. Your Mum is the only one who can decide whether you marry Riley or not. " He replied.
"But… Dad. You know how Mum's. You have to help me convince her… I can't marry Riley again. Especially after knowing what I know. I really can't Dad." I grabbed his hands and looked at him pleadingly.
"I wish I could help you but I can't. You belong to your mum. She is the only one who can make a decision about this." He said, his voice filled with regret.
"But you are my Dad. You have a say too. All you have to do is tell her no… Why are you always letting her do as she likes?!" I suddenly grew angry mid-sentence and snapped at him.
"Because I do not have any legal right over you!" He replied, throwing me off again. What did he mean?
"What do you mean Dad?" I asked, staring at him intently. I felt like chilled water was poured all over me. "You are not my father?!" I asked.
"No. That is not it. I am your father but you belong to your mother."
"I don't understand."