CHAPTER 25 – RICHARD
"One more bottle of tequila!" I yell out to the bartender, twirling the shot glass in my loose grip. My eyes are getting heavy from a couple of drinks I've had. But it doesn't matter. I plan on getting fucking wasted tonight.
The bartender places the bottle in front of me and Ray reaches to grab it. I beat him to it, grabbing the bottle and turning the other way to pour myself a drink.
"That's enough, man. You drinking way too much." Ray sighs behind me.
"Not as much as I plan on," I reply briskly, placing the bottle on the counter. I chug down my drink and it heats my throat, leaving me with a strong urge to pour myself another glass. You could say I'm a fucking addict, but tequila has always been it for me.
"Dude, what are you talking about? We both know you've never been a good drinker. Booze drives you insane. Makes you do the craziest things. Isn't that why you quit drinking? What the hell is going on with you tonight?!"
Yeah, right. I scoffed at his lecturing, gulping down another shot of tequila. I'm a great drinker. I've got a firm stomach and I can control an incredible amount of booze. But it seems the other Richard who used to live in this world is a terrible drinker. I'm not surprised. He's a fucking pussy and sucks in so many things that make one a real man. All he did well in this life was kiss Father's fucking ass. He's such a sissy!
"Don't worry about that. I'm not gonna act crazy…"
"You already do." Ray cuts me off sharply. His glass has been empty for a while and it seems he doesn't have any plans of refilling it. All he wants is to persistently nag me.
"Excuse you?" I arch a brow at him.
"You acting damn crazy already!" He reiterates louder, giving me a hard scowl.
"Why do you say that?" I ask with a cocked brow.
"Because it's the fact!" He snaps. "What the hell are we doing in a nightclub, Richard? You don't visit places like this. It's damn crazy that you insisted on coming here." Ray points out.
Oh. Of course, I know it has to be one of the things I've done differently today. It's either the nightclub, the Omega I fucked, or the memories I don't have. He thinks I'm crazy because I'm not giving off the boring, idiotic vibe the other Richard gives.
But being crazy is one thing, acting differently is another. It's rather insulting that he thinks I'm crazy. But I can't even get mad at him for it. My mind is being pricked by more sensitive issues, and I'm beginning to feel depressed from the thoughts.
"Why the hell didn't you tell me about the Luna…" I take a sharp breath and add, "...about my mother?"
"What do you mean by that?" He asks in irritation. "Did you also lose the memories of the Luna? Was that why you were so awkward with her today? You didn't recognize her?"
"I did recognize her. I just…" My lies couldn't fit. I didn't know what to say. So I just sigh, and gulp down another shot of tequila.
"When I told you the only two people who had your back when you came to the human world to erect your company were me and the Luna. Who the hell did you think I was referring to?" Ray reminds me.
Damn. I lower my head to the counter, cursing myself out. How the fuck was I so stupid and scatterbrained? Why was I so interested in knowing about my brothers that I hadn't paid enough attention when he mentioned Mother? If only I understood what he said there. Then maybe meeting her tonight wouldn't feel so…devastating.
Seeing her tonight shook my world out of balance. Just a glimpse at her and all my locked-up emotions are twirling on the surface. I'm overwhelmed and I can't even begin to sort out my thoughts.
She looks the same as she did decades ago when she was alive in the other world. Whether it be this universe or the other, her Auburn hair still glows like the moon. Her brown eyes still hold so much love that it feels surreal. Seeing her tonight just created chaos in my heart. Chaos I'm fighting so hard to quiet.
Memories of that night she died in the other world are now haunting me. For years, I've had them locked up in the basement of my heart. The guilt. The tears. The agony. I locked them all up but now, they've surfaced and I have to deal with them again. Why?! The fuck why?!
It took me years to bury the memories of that night. Why did all have to surface in just a few seconds of seeing her? And this isn't even her. This is the other her in this world. The real her is dead. The real her is the mother I had in the other world. The woman I saw tonight is just her face, not her…but it doesn't seem to change a thing. Seeing her hurts. Looking at her tonight hurts. There's no downplaying it.
I order another bottle of tequila, as I try to distract myself from my thoughts. I recall that I'd just gone to Hemington but I didn't feel my wolf Inside me.
"I thought you said I'm gonna feel my wolf when I get to Hemington?" I ask Ray, glancing at him with drowsy eyes.
"What?" He asks with creased brows.
I shake my head. "Nevermind."
It's an odd question and it could just make him suspect that I'm not the real Richard of this world. I'll just ask Flair about my wolf next time I meet her. Because right now, I still feel empty as if I don't have a wolf. And I need Parker, my wolf, to be with me when I finally see Jane. That's the only way I can feel the mate bond with her.
"Are you sure you okay, man? I don't understand what's up with you today." Ray asks, pouring himself a drink. The led lights are reflecting on his face, and once again, I'm reminded that I'm in a nightclub.