"I am here..." He said reassuringly. He pulled away and poured some water to calm my shivering form.
"Here. Drink some water." My hands were trembling uncontrollably from fear. He put the glass near my lips as I drank a little water. I was letting out heavy breaths. I pulled the duvets over me and hid under it and began to shake violently. He rubbed his hands over my shaky form, trying to ease me. After a while my petrified form calmed down a little, Desmond wiped my tears. My mind was filled with terror. I looked at Desmond, it looked like he didn't move from the chair for the night. He was still in that messy form. He tugged under the duvet as well and put my head on his chest. His one hand is in my hair while his other hand held mine and began to draw random patterns over my hands with his thumb. My form is still alarmed and startled.
"It's alright..." He said in a gentle tone. I removed my hands from him as my both hands held his shirt as I snuggled close to him.
"Those pictures are not the reason I dropped out..." I began to say hiding my face on his chest. He wrapped his arms protectively around me.
"They...."I began to say as I shivered when I remembered that horrendous day.
"You don't have to force yourself," Desmond spoke in a soft tone.
"Please let me..." I begged him. He nuzzled close to me and kissed my shoulder.
"Okay..." He said.
"Giselle, Anne, My whole class.. that day... the party... they ... locked me in my locker... I cried for help but no one came... I stayed locked for 5 hours... I passed out due to lack of oxygen... I was unconscious when they threw me into a random classroom... I have been really scared of the dark ever since then... I couldn't stay there any longer. I dropped out...." I said as I began to sob. Desmond pulled me close and kissed my shoulder again.
"I will never let any pain reach you ever again.." He said compassionately. He held me in a never letting go manner. I closed my eyes as I let out my cries. I want to believe this so badly but, my fears of him are too much. I want to tell him that he is my greatest dread but, instead of saying the truth I said,
"Promise?"
"Promise." His voice sounds so hurt. He was filled with compassion for me. I sniffed as my grip on his shirt tightened.
"You know.. mother and father used to be so strict... I told them that I can't study in that hell anymore but they didn't listen ... after that incident.... they regret so much... Ever since they never forced anything upon me..." I said.
"You are too kind.." Desmond said as I smiled and mumbled,
"I love you, Desmond...." I closed my eyes as he continued to soothe me. Soon, I fell asleep in his embrace.
----
"Ester, I love you, more than you can believe and imagine..."
I heard that voice of sweet addiction and allowed myself to be submerged in that fleeting elation that never lasted more than some mere words but, they are treasured...
I woke up, feeling the warmth filled with affection around me. I smiled as I looked at Desmond. Poor him he slept in that position the whole night and with the lights turned on. I stayed in his arms, never wanting to leave them. This is my paradise. He promised he won't hurt me. But, a feeling of uneasiness still lingers in my heart. I don't want any bad thoughts to ruin my solace. I close my eyes, resting my head on the chest of my beloved husband.
But, no. I need to go to the washroom. I pouted. I truly don't want to. I shifted as I got out of his grasp. He instantly woke up.
"Sorry..." I gave him an apologetic look. He rubbed his eyes. He looks very tired.
"It's alright." He said as he laid down. I got out of the bed and freshened up. I sat beside him and put my hand on his shoulder. I still felt scared to do anything without his permission- especially touching him.
"Are you alright?" I asked softly.
"Yeah..... just tired..." I smiled. I turned off the lights and covered the sunlight using curtains. I turned and looked at Desmond. He was lying on his stomach with both arms and legs stretched out. I chuckle to myself. He must be exhausted. I closed the door behind me. I grinned like crazy remembering last night.
I was walking around the house as my phone rang,
"Hello?" I said.
"Hello, Sweetie." I heard my father's voice.
"How are you?" I asked.
"We are fine and you?"
"I am very fine!" I beamed.
"I am glad. By the way, you haven't forgotten about the dinner, have you?" I stick my tongue out. I totally forgot about dinner. I heard my father's sigh.
"Thanks for reminding me!" I said merrily.
"Don't be late, okay?"
"Yup!" I said childishly. Father chuckled and said, "Okay then, See you."
"See you. Take care. Bye," I smiled as I cut the call. I forgot about the family gathering dinner. We all are getting together. Me and Desmond. Mr and Mrs Corte. Mother and father. The last time we were together was when I asked for a divorce. And now, we are coming together. How time flies and circumstances change, This is what fate is...
I was swinging in the garden. A lot happened. Finally, my relationship with Desmond is getting better. I still felt alarmed under his touch. But I also get a divine source of fondness in his arms.
I badly want to believe that he won't hurt me again but the fears he induced in my heart are irremovable. The feeling of apprehension surges through me whenever I am with him. A part of me wanted to relax in his arms while another part of me felt scared that he would show his hatred, the moment I lowered my guard.
He is my husband, I should trust him that much, at least. My love for him is still far more than my fear. It's alright.
On the other hand, The unexplainable feeling of content gushed through me whenever he showed his affection. The feeling of elation just by his little hint of tenderness. The exhilaration which is extensive, fills my very being. The eerie feeling that bounds me close to him.
I sighed loudly, I am just stuck between these two feelings.
It's almost lunchtime. The dinner is next week since we are going to cook, I need to know Desmond's favorite food. I was walking, then, I saw Desmond, I quickly went to him.
"Good Morning!" I beam at him.
"Morning?" He asked. I looked at the time.
"Oh! Good Afternoon!" I grinned again.
"How are you?" He asked. I blushed a little. He asked about me.
"I am fine. Thanks to you." I smiled. He has a towel around his neck. His hairs are dripping wet. He had just taken a shower. He was wearing his casual shirt and trousers. He looks so handsome in any kind of attire. And his presence always remains the same; powerful, no matter what.
"How was your sleep?" I asked in a shy manner. He looked at me. I gave him an innocent look.
"I called you, but you left." He said in a disappointing tone. I felt butterflies in my stomach as my heart fluttered with happiness.
"Sorry... I must not have heard you..." I said with a faint smile. He hummed in response and gave me the towel.
"Hang it." He said as he left. I went to our room and hung the towel.
I came to the dining hall for lunch and saw Desmond. I smiled radiantly as I took a seat. We were eating as I remembered,
"Desmond," I called him. "What is it?" He asked.
"You know, about the family dinner." Even he remembers the dinner but not me.
"Yeah, what about it?" He asked, raising his eyebrow. I loved how perfectly he raised them.
"Since I'm gonna cook too, so..." I trailed off. I felt nervous to ask him. Thinking he might pass a rude comment. He narrowed his eyes a little,
"What is it, Ester?" My heart always skips a beat when he says my name.
"What is your favorite food?" I asked real quick. Instead of a taunt, I heard his chuckle, my whole being stopped as I looked at him with wide eyes. I felt like I was fleeting. My heart was pounding, as strange sensations took over me.
"I don't have a specific preference. I will eat anything made by you." He smiled as I lowered my gaze in a shy manner. My cheeks burned red and I felt so happy. We began to eat in silence then. After he stood up and left, pinching my cheeks sweetly. I was utterly shocked by what just happened. After he left, I began to squeak like crazy in blithe.