I miss Ben. It has been nineteen hours since I last saw him. He left school earlier but he’s picking me up from Leah’s house to make up for yesterday. Leah’s parents are not home so we have the whole house to ourselves.
There are three boxes of cereal in front of us. It’s a bit wasteful but we don’t really care as we empty the three brands in our bowls. Leah grins at Mira. They are sitting side by side. I am on the opposite side of the table and very much happy with the position.
We are all laughing as we munch breakfast. Me. Mira. Leah. They are really cool minus all the kissing that happened last night. I could barely sleep.
“Who do you think will win prom king?” Leah asks. She and Mira are part of the prom committee.
Her girlfriend shrugs. “Don’t know.”
“Probably Calum,” I say.
Without an hierarchy, there are no favourites in our school but Calum seems popular among the other contestants. Plus, he’s single and friendly. They nod in agreement. None of us speak till we are done eating. Leah is assigned kitchen duties while Mira and I rush up to get our bags.
A honk sounds from outside. I shove my books and other things in my bag while Mira goes to check on the visitor. She opens the windows and light cracks in. When she turns to me with a wide grin, I know my ride to school is here and I don’t feel bad for ditching them. Leah will drive her to school, they can kiss and fondle all they want.
I barely remember hugging Mira or Leah but I am outside the house in a flash, running to hug Ben. He catches me in his arms and my legs lock around his waist. Laughing, he tries to steady himself on his feet.
The sun shines on his forehead and he squints. I kiss him twice. On his nose and his lips. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too,” he replies.
Our heads turn to the entrance of Leah’s house, both girls are outside, staring at us like disapproving parents. We wave at them, they wave back and Ben carries me inside the car. Since they are watching, I can’t kiss him the way I want to, so I grudgingly ask him to start the car.
Another honk later and the car is zooming down the street. I offer him my hand and he laces our fingers over the console. “How was it? Did you get the deal?”
Ben snickers and spares me a glance. “It was not a deal. It was the house. For Josef and my mum.” He honks at the car slowing down in front of us, frowning as he swerves past it. “I went to check it out yesterday. It’s really nice. Want to see?”
“When?”
“Now.”
He switches lanes and I know very well that’s not the same path Leah took when she was bringing us to her home.
“That’s not the way to school.”
“I know.”
I should caution him. Give him a lecture so he turns back but I say, “You’re a bad influence.”
His laughter surrounds me in a bubble, I lean on the window and close my eyes. “Did you get my text?” We chatted for most of last night and he never mentioned Jon’s offer. The only reply Jon got from me was a short text letting him know I would need time to think about it. His response was: Okay. I am not sure if it means the offer still stands but I will worry about it later. “The one about Vogue. Being on the cover. Don’t tell me you forgot already?”
“Oh. That one.” His nonchalant tone earns him a stern glare from me and he does an awkward half shrug. “Yeah, I’m cool with it as long as you are. It’s up to you. What do you think? Is it a good one?”
“I don’t know.”
Minutes roll by, his head bobs in rhythm to a beat only he’s privy to. I close my eyes, fingers drumming on my knees. Hayden thinks it’s a good one. Daddy too. Mum, who has an idea how the industry works is certain that other companies or magazines would love to feature me since I’m the ‘IT’ thing at the moment. And that will encroach on my time with Ben. Ben has to be the top priority.
“What are the pros?” he asks.
I look out the window. Buildings blend into each other the further we drive. I’m not familiar with this part of the city.
The most important pro is that I get to talk about living with vitiligo. Girls my age, younger and older than me will know they don’t have to hide it.
It’s what I tell him and I add, “Plus, a pretty girl like me should show her face to the whole world.” His laughter is so abrupt and short. That’s what Mum said after giving me all the reasons it could be a good or bad idea. She wasn’t so helpful. Like Ben, she said, it’s my decision and whatever happens, they will all be there to support me. “Benny, focus.”
“I’m focused,” he says but there’s laughter in his voice. “Okay. What are the cons?”
This one comes easily. “Haters. Hate comments. Trolls. Death threats.” Maria let me see some of the messages she has received and I was horrified. A shudder runs through me just from thinking about it. There’s always that one or two miserable fans ready to bring her down and it is exhausting. What keeps her going are the positive comments and emails. If she keeps looking at the negative, that’s the only thing she will see so she’s more focused on the positives. I can try to do that. “That’s all, I guess.”
The car finally comes to a stop in front of a row of apartments. I shield my eyes from the sun to get a better view of the building. It is tall and pretty, the kind of building you can expect to see in a movie with a successful character. Nice and comfortable.
Ben smoothens his lap. “Come here.” He doesn’t have to ask twice. I cup his face and kiss him properly. Ben pulls back with a grin and gives me one last kiss to my lips. “I think it’s great to talk about yourself. Talk more about your superpower, babe. At any point you don’t feel comfortable, you can ask them to stop. I’m always here for you.”
The lines on his forehead fade. I like it when he calls it a superpower. “If you don’t want to do it, I’m here. If you want to do it, I’m still here. I’ll always be here. But I really think you should give it a go.” His lips brush mine as if to seal his promise. I hug him. I’ll be fine. “Alright, we need to go up.”
His excitement rubs off on me as we exit the car. Ben’s talking so much at once about this place, its proximity to NYU, the mobility. It is perfect for his parents and Asher. We stop in front of the elevator and I kiss him to silence him. His cheeks flush and his eyes crinkle.
“I needed that,” he murmurs and punches the floor number into the elevator. Once we are inside, I kiss him again for a longer period. I feel his boner against my thigh and purr into his mouth. He tears himself away from me against my protest. Eyes hooded, chest heaving and hands running over his hair, our eyes lock in a stare. “You are so pretty.”
I blush. “You’re so pretty too.”
“Boys are not pretty,” he says, already linking our hands as we near our destination. “But I’ll take that since it’s coming from you.”
The elevator pings and we step into the corridor. There are doors on each side of the corridor. I count ten before we stop.
Ben opens the door to room number nine and ushers me inside. The smell of new leather welcomes me in and I stop behind a couch. The couches are covered in a plastic film. Some of the items are still in their boxes but the television has been fixed.
Standing in the middle of the living room, Ben sweeps his hand over the place and my eyes follow the movement. “What do you think, babe?”
“Super,” I reply. I spare another look at the living room. From here I can see the door leading to the kitchen. It is big enough for a family of three. I am smiling again when I say, “Super. I really like it.”
A part of me wishes it’s our place and he is giving me a tour of it. We haven’t discussed accomodations and I hope he’s in agreement with living with me. We have to live together. Hostels are out of it.
Ben leads me to the huge kitchen and I swipe my hand over the counter. There’s almost everything a house should need. Running water. Electricity. Other things shouldn’t be a problem for them. The fridge is empty, Ben laughs at me when I return to him with a pout. He hoists me on the counter to stand between my legs and I stretch his cheeks.
“Josef said I could pick out the furniture. Bed, table, anything you can think of. It is my choice. He trusts my decision.” His chest puffs as he says this and I’m thankful to Josef for entrusting him with this duty. “I don’t know yet what to get for their room.”
“When are they moving in?”
He shrugs and his cute pout appears. “I don’t know. After graduation? I’ll have to ask him to be sure.”
My thumb traces his lower lip, his tongue darts out to wet my fingertip. “If they don’t mind, you should get a portrait of something they like for the room.” Ben laughs. That’s the kind of thing I would have gotten if this place was ours. He says nothing as I continue to list out items I like. “...a round table too with a bouquet on it. That can stay by the window.”
“Is that all?” he asks when I’m done rambling. I nod and his eyes darken. He helps me down from the counter. “Do you want to see their room?”
We exit the kitchen and I turn back to give it one last sad look. I can imagine Ben cooking while I bake and handle the dishes. He claims to be a great cook but we will have to wait to test the theory.
I almost run into Ben when he stops abruptly and he murmurs an apology. Fear flashes across his face before he opens the door. I throw him a worried look and he smiles, a very fake smile. He should know better than trying to act like everything is fine when it’s not. I can read him like the back of my palm.
“Ben...”
He walks inside before I finish my statement and I follow behind him. I suck in a breath and my steps waver. There are pink petals scattered all over the floors. There’s also a heart made from the petals.
“Well...” Ben says. He stands beside the curve of the heart, a shaky smile on his lips. “Yes or yes?”
In the centre of the heart, there’s a question that I don’t reply to. A frustrated Ben runs his hand over his hair. I laugh. Of course I’ll go to prom with him.
Covering my mouth, I nod. “Yes and yes.” I pick the bar of chocolate by a petal and peel it open. “What’s this for?” I take a bite and nod my approval. Then I feed him part of it. “Tastes so good, babe. Thanks.”
“It was meant to be a bribe in case you said no.”
Laughter tumbles out of my lips. I like this bribe but he didn’t need one. “Why would I even say no? To you?” He shrugs. My gaze returns to the heart and my chest tightens. “I didn’t think you would ask.”
His arms circle my waist from behind and I wrap my hands around his. He places a kiss behind my neck and sighs softly. “You thought I forgot?”
“No. Not that.” Twisting in his arms, I palm his face. “I was thinking you wouldn’t ask. I mean, it’s automatic. It should be automatic, right? I’m your girlfriend so I should be your prom date.” A second later, I say, “I’ve never been asked to prom before.”
“Did I do good?” he asks.
“Yes.”
“How good?”
I grin. “Very good. You did awesomely well.”
Ben lifts me up and whispers, “Really? One of the rooms has a bed with clean sheets. I made sure yesterday. You can tell me how good I did there.”
A grin accompanies his words but his words please me even more. “So this was your plan all along?”
“Maybe?” His hands move below my butt. “Is it a yes or a yes? Are you going to show your Benny?”
My head dips and my lips brush his ear. “Lead the way, Benny.”