CHAPTER 64. GLOOMY NIGHT
RYDER
I yanked down her dress to her waist and her boobs sprang free. I groped them both at once, sucking and nibbling her erect nipples.
“Ryder..uh…mhmm…“ She moaned, as her fingers raked through my hair. She was squirming against the wall, basking in the pleasure of how hard I was sucking her boobs.
My tongue licked her from her cleavage, up to her neck, and then to her lips. The kiss was demanding, bruising, ravenous.
I raked every inch of her mouth, sucking her up, giving her no room to breathe.
My hand cupped her mound through her dress, rubbing it hard and her squirming increased. I wasn't sure if she was squirming out of pleasure, or if she wanted to break free from me. But I didn't let her go, I rubbed her mound faster, feeling her wetness through the fabric.
Her firm hands on my taut chest gave me a forceful push that broke the kiss.
"I can't…breathe…" She gasped, fighting to catch her breath. I was so busy kissing her that I didn't give her space to breathe.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know..." I said in a breathy tone. I closed up the distance again, pinning her back to the wall with my body. I gave her a few seconds to catch enough breath before I continued from where I stopped.
I rolled down her dress to her feet and she stepped away from it. With just her panties on, I went ahead to feast on her.
“Ryder-'' Her words turned into a loud moan as my finger flicked her clit through her panties. I nibbled her low lips at the same time, and our hot breaths aligned, increasing the pleasure of the moment.
“I couldn't breathe back there when you were in his arms…" I said in a breath, kissing her lips again. She backed away seconds later, panting for air.
“Ryder-“
I gave her wet kisses down to her boobs, I held both and buried my face in the middle of them.
“When you stared at him like you missed him, it broke my heart,“ I mused in between her boobs, squeezing them both.
“I'm…sorry,“ She moaned out, I reached for her lips again and took her through another deep kiss.
She broke the kiss again and looked deep into my eyes. Tears rolled down her eyes, as she stared at me.
“Ryder, I…“
“No, don't say it,“ I stopped her from saying whatever it was she was itchy to say. I was scared she might wanna admit she still loves her ex-mate. I don't wanna hear that, not today, not ever.
My lips met hers again, and this time, I gave no room for talks. I carried her to the bed with her legs tightly locked around me.
We fell on the bed and she didn't release her legs, I fucked her through the night and her moans echoed through the walls of the building.
This wasn't just any typical fuck session. It wasn't just for pleasure either. I was fully clothed and my dick was just sticking out and fucking her through my fly.
Her frantic hands tried countless times to unbutton my shirt but I didn't let her. This moment wasn't about me, it was about her.
This was love-making, and every thrust I gave had an overwhelming dose of my love for her. But she was still unsure of her feelings for me, so I can't let her touch me, not until she sorted her feelings out.
”Ry...d…er!” She gasped, as her pussy clenched around my dick, I gave her one more hard thrust that brought us both to our release. I collapsed on her as we both panted for air.
I hid my face in her hair, tears had made their way down my eyes and I didn't want her to see that.
“Ryder,“ She whimpered with a weak struggle, and that was when I realized my weight was crushing her.
I stood from the bed and left the room, she called out my name repeatedly but I couldn't go back to her.
No matter how much she tries to hide it, I could see she was conflicted with herself and needed some time to clear her head and think. So I intend to leave her alone for a while, giving her as much time, space, and distance as she needed to think. But I hope in all that thinking, she never forgets how much I truly love her. I'll be damned if she ends up throwing my love for her in the mud and running back to her ex-mate.
I got to the wine cellar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey and a glass. I set them on the small bar and poured myself a drink.
“Ryder,“ It was Darius. He walked to where I stood.
I wasn't in the mood for chit-chats so I wanted to dismiss him, but then I remembered how weird he had been at the party.
“I see you wanna be alone, so I'll just head to my room, “ He said and turned to leave.
“Hold on, man,“ I stopped him from leaving. “Do you know the man from the party?” I asked him.
“Who? The one that held Hara's hands?“
“Yes, do you know him?” I asked again. I saw a hint of uneasiness in his eyes but he immediately covered it up.
”Nah, I don't. Why?” he said quickly.
But he knows Roland. I can see it in his eyes. What I don't understand is why he has to lie about it.
I would have tapped into his mind, but I didn't. I'm worried enough about Hara, I don't wanna add more worries to myself. I'll just find out what he's hiding later.
“Nothing. Nevermind. Goodnight,“ I gave him a curt nod and headed to my room with the bottle and the glass.
Out on my balcony, I let myself wallow in sadness. I always knew this day would come. Hara has been with me for months but I always knew her mate would show up someday to claim her back. But I thought that Hara and I would already be official before he showed up. I thought her feelings for me would be definite and I might have already marked her as my mate.
But he chose to show up now when so many things were still unresolved. Hara is still unsure of what she feels. She only began to warm up to me recently and reciprocate some of my love gestures but she's yet to fully open her heart to me.
Why did he have to show up now and ruin everything? Hara was pretty shocked when she saw him, and I'm sure her growing feelings for me have been scattered all over the place. Right now, I'm insecure as hell and I've got every right to be.
I love Hara, Goddess knows I do, but her heart still beats for her ex-mate. What if she wakes up and decides to go back to him? What should I do? Do I let her go or do I hold on tight to her, even though she loves him more than she loves me?
What should I do? What's gonna happen to us, Hara? What's gonna happen to my love for you? If only I had someone to talk to, if only Jason was here.