She woke up with jolt and breathed heavily. Her whole body was drenched in sweat. She placed her hand on her chest and found her heart, beating rapidly like the wings of a caged bird.
The smell of hospital disinfectant invading her nostrils. The room was silent apart from her heavy breathing and a beep beep sound which indicated that she was alive. She glanced around and took in the desolate blue and white colour schemed hospital bedroom, grayish linens and unnecessary art hanging around the room.
Zahra couldn't recall how she got there but the last few things that she remembered were the warehouse, gunshot and Irtaza's face.
"Irt.za" spoke Zahra in broken voice. She pulled on the IV line and felt a sharp pain. If anything that murky room was making her was even more nauseous. Irtaza's life mattered more than her health at that moment. She just needed someone to tell her that everything's alright and he was not in danger. Her limbs felt powerless and heavy. With great struggle she dragged herself out of the suffocating room.
"Zahra, you are awake!" said Dua making Zahra turn her head to left.
"How do you feel, wait, you need to sit. Don't exert yourself " Dua continued to speak, a frown etching on her face as she helped her to sit.
"Dua, what happened? Where is Irtaza?" she asked when she got her senses.
"You fainted when Shehryaar bhai brought you here"
"Where is Irtaza?" Zahra asked again, tense lines forming on her face. She dreaded the answer.
Dua looked down in dejection, swallowed the lump in her throat and shook her head in denial.
"Bhai... he is in the ICU. They had to perform laparoscopic removal. He is responding to the treatment but his wound is severe."
Zahra closed her eyes and sucked in sharp breath. She was relieved and worried at the same time. His last words repeating in her head making a thick knot form in her throat. She was trying hard to control her tears. Her knuckles turned pallid due to the tightness she held the bench.
Just then two surgeons in their scrubs came out of the ICU and both Zahra and Dua got up, moving towards them.
"Miss Syed, the wound has caused retroperitoneal bleeding which has intoxicated the cavity near the cerebral nerve that may result in coma or if CN VI pathway remains unaffected the patient can wake up any time. So it's up to God now, we have tried our best. We know nothing can expiate the loss of a loved one. You have to be strong" one of them spoke addressing Dua.
The doctor's words pierced through Zahra's fragile and already broken heart. All her strength drained away. She sat down on a chair nearby. She didn't care about how she looked, where she stood but only him. He saved her but she didn't want to be, she wished she had died then and there as what she was going through now was more painful.
The dam of her tears broke and she wept silently looking in front of her while Dua called the nurse who took care of Zahra. When left alone, she glanced at the ICU door and contemplated whether to go in or not. Thinking this she neared it and peeped inside.
His body laid on the bed, monitors around and his eyes shut, making Zahra state weaker on her knees.
She didn't know why was she feeling sad on seeing him like that. She should not. It was the perfect moment to quench her revenge, at this very moment she could kill him easily. So easily that even no one would take her as a suspect. She could take revenge of all the atrocities he inflicted on her. His life was in her hands.
But here, she felt sad. She now owed her life to him. If it wasn't for him, she would have not been alive today.
She closed her eyes, her thick lashes drenched in tears as she sent a prayer to heaven for his better health.
Two days passed, the hospital staff would give her a terse description about his health and how it fluctuated from time to time. Zahra couldn't muster the courage to go inside but she didn't leave the hospital either. She was utterly restless. Her mother always coaxed her for meals but she had lost appetite long time ago.
She never went inside his room or peeped inside after that night. Seeing him in such condition had disturbed her utterly. It was so depressing to see him like that.
Two more days passed but she still didn't go inside nor did leave the hospital. But the bad news was that, his response was slowing down. She was so worried.
On the fifth day, her strings of patience stretched, she was so done. She barged inside the empty room and stood near him. His unconscious proximity broke her shell. Her shoulders slumped down as she stood by him.
"Wake up please" she whispered with quivering breaths.
"Why did you save me? Huh? I should be in your place. Irtazaa!, please look don't test my endurance now. I am not that strong" said Zahra in violent whispers, her fists clenched.
When his immobile body made no signs, she closed her eyes, sat beside him and stared into nothing.
It was not the first time he saved her. The first was when he saved her from her own self. That day, she still remember it clearly, all those emotions were so distinct and different. She had never felt something like that ever before.
The thirst.
The fire.
The revenge.
Memories of that day were still vivid, producing powerful and strong feelings clear to her mind. She remembered how she had grasped the gun with the motive of killing Daniyal.
She wanted her revenge. At that moment, she found solace in hurting him. She just wanted to see him in pain, battered, shattered and weeping.
The hurt of betrayal had pulled the strings of her heart. No patience was left in her and seeing his end was the first and last thing she wanted that day.
But God knows, what would have happened if she really had killed Daniyal. No matter what, killing someone was a gunah-e-kabeera. Sins of all sins.
She didn't give this life then who was she to take it from Daniyal. When she had got back to her senses, that day, the feelings of guilt came along with it. It grieved her that she tried to take someone's life away.
The potent emotions of revenge had reduced her to a killer. It was against her morals even to hurt an insect and there she was, killing someone.
It was Irtaza who had saved her that day. From her own self. Else she was never able to meet her own eyes ever again.
Talking of revenge, she recalled those bloody, devilish eyes that belonged to none other than the man lying near her. Her first week in his mansion after marriage was nothing less than a tour of hell, he made sure of that. She would cry herself to sleep every night there and pray to never wake up the next day.
She never in her wildest dreams thought that Irtaza would turn this cruel towards her.
But after having a taste of betrayal from her beloved as well she could understand the extent of such vengeful feelings. One feels like someone has ripped their heart and breached their trust. The funny thing is it never comes from strangers but only the people who you thought were yours, who had your back just so they can butcher at right moment and leave you to die.
Irtaza's deeds can't be justified but her betrayal wasn't forgivable either. She did to him what Daniyal did to her. Both share the blame of misunderstanding and tension between them. But all this was out of frame now as Zahra's mind was fixated on Irtaza.
He knew from the start that either one of them would survive and they would shoot him yet he came to the death cave to protect her. If that's not love then what is?
Did he really love her to that extent?
Maybe it was. Her grandmother had told her he had waited for her, for years. It made her guilty that she played with his feelings like that.
"Don't die" she whispered to him. Her eyes solemnly looking at him.
She could feel her eyes being closed due to sleep and she placed her head on his chest. Her eyes closed and she slept, with him.
The sun was up, peeking from blinders. Zahra felt a hand caressing her hair gently.
She frowned.
She abruptly straightened herself and jerked her head towards him.
She couldn't believe it. No. She couldn't.
Her eyes got rounded with surprise.
Irtaza was wide awake and watching her with amusement. A smile playing on his lips.
"Irtaza ..you..you are awake" she said, her voice getting shaky.
"No" he shook his head, smiling. Zahra's heart seized on hearing his voice, seeing him all fine infront her.
She chuckled. Tears of happiness forming in her eyes.
"You are so bad" she croaked out.
"Me?" he feigned ignorance and caressed her hand, which was placed in his.
"Yes, you. What took you so long to wake up?"
"I was waiting for you to come close to me and hold my hand like this" he replied and her eyes moved towards there hands. Blush creeping up on her cheeks.
"I'll call the doctor" she said shyly and stood up, then trying to release her hand from his.
He suddenly jerked her forward, their face now inches apart. His eyes staring at her brown ones, intensely.
"Let me have a look at you, Zahra" he whispered, placing his other hand on the nape of her neck bringing her forward. His lips descending on hers when the door suddenly opened and Shehryaar barged in.
Zahra immediately backed off and he let her go.
"I'll call the doctor" she said and left the room, embarrassed.
"Are you fine?" he asked, sitting on the sofa near his bed.
"Yes. I'm. Want to be discharged today"
"Alright"
"Where's everyone?"
"Only me, Zahra and Dua are here at the moment. Dadi was worried sick"
"Tell her that I'm up now"
"Will do"
"What about Khurram and Amman?"
"They are under our custody" he informed, "Moosa had managed to get his hands on them"
"I hope they aren't killed yet. I'd take their lives with my own hand"
"No. They are alive" he told when the doctor came in and checked on him. After a few moments Dua came with Zahra and hugged her brother tightly, informing him that her father and her uncle are coming to hospital.
Soon, both Shehryaar left to attend a call and Dua too, giving space to both Irtaza and Zahra.
"Are you fine now?" she asked whilst sitting on the sofa when he tapped the space next to him and she sat there, beside him.
"I'm and how are you?" he asked gently taking her hand in his.
"I'm too"
"Zahra, I want to tell you something" he told seriously grabbing her attention.
"Yes?" she frowned
"It was my mafia"
"I dont understand"
"It was my mafia, which loaned your father. Those were my people who asked you to empty the house if you aren't able to pay back the loan" he revealed.