DYLAN
I was such a coward.
A stupid, helpless dweeb who couldn't protect his woman. What good was having her in my life if I couldn't even fucking ensure her safety?
Madeline was out there, and every minute Brielle spent with me was one that could put her in even more danger.
I couldn't have that.
She was better off with someone else… someone who was more capable of taking care of her— someone whose… whose baggage didn't turn around to haunt his perfect life in anyway,
She needed someone who wasn't me.
That was why I was gently exiting her life. She may not want that now, but eventually, she'd come to thank me for saving her from my messy life. She would come to realize that I'd done her a huge favor when she's happy with some other man.
With some other man who could give her the protection and safety I never could.
I was going to go on that trip.
And while I was away, I was going to do whatever it took to make sure that Madeline was found while hoping that Brielle would forgive me for giving up on her— for… for giving up on us. But even if she didn't… even if our paths weren't going to cross again romantically, I was going to try my possible best to be okay with it because sometimes, loving someone meant you had to let them go.
The car pulled up in front of RetroCorp and I got out, heading straight for my office. There were a few files I needed for the trip and I didn't have copies due to how confidential they were. Chloe was waiting for me at her desk when I got there, and one look at my face told her that something was seriously wrong. “Dylan… what is it? Is Brielle okay?” She asked in concern.
“Yeah, yeah she's fine.” I brushed past her into my office, but she was right behind me, apparently still not convinced. She scrutinized me critically. “Oh no. What did you do this time, Dylan?”
I raised an eyebrow, pausing the task of packing files into the briefcase I was holding for a moment. “What makes you think I did anything?”
“I don't really know,” She shrugged. “Maybe the fact that you're known to really fuck up sometimes? Or maybe the fact that Madeline came into your life exactly because of these rash decisions you've been making? I'm not exactly sure which.” She finished thoughtfully.
“I would not have you talking to me anyhow, Chloe. You work for me. Do your best to remember that.” I bellowed, but she still stood there, head held high, undeterred. Maybe it was because she knew that despite all my bark, I would never threaten her job security in any way. Or maybe it was because of the fact that we had quickly become friends who sometimes sought advice from one another. She took a deep breath. “Look, Dylan. I'm just saying… Brielle needs you more right now, and if you try to focus on her safety and distance yourself, it isn't really going to do the two of you any good.”
“Madeline is still out there, Chloe!” I exclaimed heatedly. “What would you have me do? Be by Brielle's side and wait for something else to happen? I can't have that!”
She shook her head. “I can see you have already made up your mind, but let me ask you this, Dylan… Did you talk to Brielle about any of this— this wonderful plan of yours? Is this what she wants? Did you both make the decision? What makes you think that if Madeline is out there, she won't still go after Brielle and end the girl's life for good to completely clear the opposition? Think about all of this.” With those last words, my assistant walked out of my office, leaving me in deep contemplation.
BRIELLE
“I don't know, Lu… but I understand where Dylan is coming from, and even kind of agree with him on this.” My best friend admitted softly after I had spilled my guts out and told her what had happened at Dylan's place and how it felt like a goodbye.
I shot her an incredulous look. “You agree with him? You agree with him?! Well, I'll tell you what… this is cowardice at its highest peak, that's what. Can't he see that we're letting Madeline win? He's giving her exactly what she wants, and I'm not going to have that.” I swore passionately.
“Are you listening to yourself right now?” Silvie cut me off, her own voice rising in incredulity. “The woman almost sold you out to a human trafficking organization for fucks sake. Before that, she threatened you with a fake gun. Who knows what the hell she's going to do yet?” Her voice broke. “I don't want to lose you, Lucia.” I wrapped my arms around her. “And you won't.” I assured her. “This whole thing will be over soon; I can feel it.”
“At least you guys should go on some kind of break un—until she's found at least. You can then get back together after that.” She begged. I didn't have the heart to tell her it wasn't going to be possible… that I couldn't stay away from Dylan for even a brief moment— that every second we weren't together was going to kill me, shatter me into a million pieces, and so I just nodded. “I’ll try.”
“You know… what you really need is a vacation to take your mind off things.” Silvie changed the subject, her mood lightening drastically.
“I can’t just go on a vacation like that, Syl… there’s work and all of that to deal with—”
“Bitch, please.” She cut me off. “You’re on sick leave, or have you forgotten? RetroCorp will do just fine for a couple of weeks without your hawk eyes and motherly care, Lucia. Say yes to this… please?”
Ugh, those puppy eyes… I couldn’t say no to them.
“Okay, fine. But only if you’re coming with me.”
“Done.”
I shot her an amused look. “Shouldn’t you like… I don’t know, maybe call work first before agreeing to go with me or something?”
“Oh, I didn’t tell you?” I raised an eyebrow, “Tell me what?”
“I didn’t tell you that I quit Rousseau’s?”
I shifted in the couch to get more comfortable, my eyes widening in disbelief. “No! No, you didn’t tell me? When did you quit?”
“I quit the night before we were supposed to have lunch,” she told me. “I— I was going to tell you all about it at lunch, but…”
Yeah, but.
We all knew what happened that day. To be honest, I’ve never been able to get it out my head. It’s been haunting me… taunting me— I keep reliving it over and over again… in broad daylight, in my dreams, in my nightmares. It didn’t want to let me go, but I tried to hide how bad it was, how bad it had gotten. I didn’t want anyone worrying more than they already were, especially Dylan. I mean, I hadn’t even been entirely honest about how bad the ordeal was, and look at him, already pushing me away from him… trying to protect me, and all of that nonsense. Surprisingly, the scene that kept replaying more than the others was the one where Anya gets rid of her and Dylan’s baby. All I see is all of that red trickling down her legs… the sad look in her eyes as she constantly repeated how unworthy she was to be a mother… that same red that had stained mum’s dress as she was being wheeled into the hospital, that same red that my poor mother just couldn’t stop throwing up…
So much red.
“LUCIA!”
I jumped out of my thoughts with a start. “Jeez, I’ve been trying to call you for the past five minutes. It was as though you were in a trance. Are you okay?” Silvie asked worriedly. I shook my head to clear the haze. Lord knows what would have happened if Silvie hadn’t snapped me out of it. “I’m fine, I’m fine. I just… I was just thinking about some stuff.”
She wasn’t fully convinced. “Lucia.” She reached out for my hand. “I’m here for you, okay? So if there’s anything… anything at all you want to— you need to talk about, you know you can talk to me, right?”
Indeed, I did.
But I just wasn’t ready. Not yet at least. I had managed to evade the psychological tests that Dylan had made the doctor schedule for me, and being the loving boyfriend he was, he hadn’t pushed when he tried to talk me into it and I vehemently said no, but I knew he was worried. Everyone was. It was almost as if they expected me to break down at some point or something, but I was fine… truly, I was. So, what if I was plagued by nightmares? So, what if I couldn’t sleep well? Those were normal stuff; they’d go away eventually.
Right?
“Yes Syl, I know I can talk to you about everything… I’m— I’m just not ready yet.” I admitted softly.
She squeezed my hand slightly, a gentle smile on her face. “That is understandable, Lucia. Truly. Take all the time you need.”
Okay, I’d had enough.
Time to change the subject. “I know where I want to go for the vacation.” I stated, my tone brightening somewhat. “Oh okay. And where’s that?” Silvie asked, all ears.
My memories flicked back to that time at the warehouse… how I’d wished for one last chance to see my family again. It was suddenly clear in that moment.
Home.
“I want to go back to Alexandria, Syl… I- I want to go home.”