"I'm off, I announced to Noah and Brian. "Don't let him eat too much rich food, please," I instructed. And make sure he brushes his teeth."
"Don't worry. I'll take good care of him, Brian promised. " When will you be back?" He asked "Uh...I'm not sure. Not too late, I don't think." I promised him with a smile. "Well, don't rush...but I do have an early meeting tomorrow," he added. "I don't want to turn in too late. Oh, okay. I'll remember, Olivia replied "Anything else? "Uh, yes... " Brian reached into his jacket pocket and withdrew his cell phone. "Here, take this. Just in case of an emergency. This way I know I can reach you. He quickly showed me his number . "All right, I stared down at the phone, then put it in my bag. I kissed Noah goodbye, then waved to Brian " Have a good time." I said to them.
"Yes, you, too," Brian said graciously, though it seemed to me as if he spoke through gritted teeth.
My dinner meeting went very well. Everything one was so nice to me and complimented me so much on my writing that I felt as if my head might not fit through the doorway on the way out. The entire staff seemed quite enthusiastic about my book and books that would follow. People from the publicity department spoke about a tour, and the marketing department people talked about my book sales. A lot of the jargon went over my head, but I was hoping that my editor would explain everything clearly when we met privately tomorrow. It was almost too much information for me to take in at one time. But one thing seemed clear everyone present seemed to think that very soon I was going to be Famous and probably quite rich. The thought was exhilarating. So much so, in fact, that it made me a bit dizzy if I thought too much about it. Still, what would my new-found success mean if finally, I didn't have Brian ? It wouldn't bring me much happiness or true comfort. As the publishing people talked, I was distracted by thoughts of Brian all night. Added to that, he called so many times on his cell phone-checking up on me, I presumed . I finally had to shut the phone off. Finally the dinner concluded, and I returned to the hotel. I rode up in the elevator alone, feeling very good about life in general. I felt ready to tell Brian everything-about my writing and my true feelings for him. It was a great risk. He could crush me with a single look. But what was the point of life at all, if you loved someone they way I loved Brian ...and never told them? I asked myself . I entered the suite to find Brian stretched out on the sofa, reading. He'd removed his jacket, tie and posing an enticing glimpse of the dak As I entered the room, he put down is shoes, and his sthirt was partially open, even exposing an enticing glimpse of the dark hair of his chest . As I entered the room,he put down the book he was reading and sat up. "Hi, how did it go," I asked. " No problems. I took Noah downtown to see the Twin Towers, then we had Japanese food. He's read about it and wanted to try some. I think he liked it" Brian reported. "He went right to bed when we got back. I guess the trp and all the excitement caught up with him." He paused and met my eye "How did your date go?" he asked casually, "Fine," I said slowly. I sat in the arm- chair closest to him, my hands folded in my lap. I cleared my throat. "It wasn'ta date, exactly...more of a business meeting. "Really?" Brian's dark brows rose slightly. "And what business are you in lately, Olivia ?..Or should I call you G. O . Chris now? I gasped. I felt a funny feeling in my stomach, as if I was standing in an elevator that had suddenly dropped a few floors. "You know about my writing...? Did Noah tell you?" "No, it wasn't Noah. I saw you on TV tonight Some segment with entertainment news. They had a piece about hot new mystery writers. They showed Your picture. It was quite a nice photo, he added. Good review, too. I just happen to be reading the new one myself. Surprising me further, he held up my latest book. I picked it up the other day. I did so enjoy the one you gave me. Maybe you can autograph them somnetime for me? His bland, conversational tone scared me. I knew him well enough already to recognize the calm before the storm. I licked my lips, which felt suddenly dry, "I was going to tell you Brain .... I was just about to tell you, in fact, before I went out tonight." "Never mind tonight. Why didn't you tell back when we first met in Texas? His voice rose on an angry note. "Are you very mad at me? I asked him. "I sure as hell want to be."" He stood up and paced around in front of the couch and chairs. "But every time I look at you...especially in that knockout black dress." he glanced at me, then dragged his hand through his hair-well, I'm just so damn happy to see you again... it's hard to stay angry at you, Olivia , he complained. "Well, that's something," I replied, feeling a little easier at his confession. Why didn't you tell me? he asked again. "It's something to be proud of. Not to lie about." I never lied, exactly," I pointed out. "And as for being proud about it...well, maybe that's just the point. What's the point? I still don't follow this convoluted Texas logic, he replied, sounding exasperated. He stood in front of me, staring down at me. He looked as if he needed a shave, I thought, distracted by his nearness. I had the urge to reach up exture of his beard-roughencd cheek . Finally I had to look away to collect my thoughts. "I know it's hard to understand," I said finally. I just want you to want me..for me. After everything you said the first night, about how you suspected me of being a fortune hunter and how unsuitable a match I'd be for you..... .."I said for my brother. Not me," he corrected me.
" Well, you meant yourself, Brian. I knew that much for sure when you kissed me." I reminded him. He sighed. "Go on, he urged her. "I guess it was dumb of me. And immature, I admitted. "But I just wanted you to love me so much that it didn't matter to you if I was without means or had an unsuitable background. Or if there was nothing to say about me that a status-conscious person would find the least bit redeeming, Olivia." concluded in a small voice. "I just wanted you to love me..for me. I felt a baseball-size lump in my throat, and my eyes were blurred with tears. I couldn't look up at Brian . I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping he would just leave. But he didn't leave. He knelt down in front of me and cupped her face in his hands. "Open your eyes, Olivia, he urged me. "Come on," honey.. Slowly I did as he asked. He was looking straight at mine, his wonderful face just inches from my Own, his expression very serious. Very solemn. I suddenly felt scared to hear what he might say. But as I gazed into his eyes I felt hope again .