Chapter 13: I Truly… Really Love You So Much
After the broken engagement, Vivian and Faust returned to how things had been before. They were still inseparable, still constantly busy.
On the surface, nothing seemed to have changed. The engagement and its cancellation were nothing more than a minor interlude.
But Vivian knew that everything had already become irreversible.
What she had believed to be mutual love had only ever been her own one-sided wish.
Faust was not her fiancé. He was no longer a treasure that belonged to both of them, nor… a soulmate bound in intimacy.
When her past illusions shattered, all that remained was the bitterness of a cruel reality.
Faust still trusted her deeply, still regarded her as a confidant and right hand—someone he might even entrust with his life if necessary.
But he alone did not see Vivian as a lover… to put it bluntly, he did not even regard her as a member of the opposite sex, as a woman.
The clearest proof of this was that Faust had never once been intimate with her.
In the past, the girl had been quite tolerant of her fiancé’s indulgent behavior. She had calmly made space for it, even encouraging it.
For a prince of a nation to have several consorts was perfectly normal. And His Highness harbored ambitions vast enough to swallow the heavens and the ages—if his harem expanded further, who would dare complain?!
There was nothing wrong with that. At the very least, it made things lively.
Moreover, Vivian did not mind the lack of physical intimacy with Faust. In fact, she had once enjoyed it.
I know we will unite one day, yet I do not know when… this ambiguous tension is like a poison that one cannot resist.
But now, as Vivian stood outside the door and watched, what arose in her heart was no longer sweet anticipation—but pure humiliation, jealousy, and even self-loathing.
She knew very well that Faust held no love for those vulgar women.
And yet, even so, it was still not her turn.
There was no other explanation for such treatment except an instinctive, physical aversion.
Each time she attended him, Vivian would dig her nails into her palms, her teeth biting through her lips, questioning herself again and again.
Why?
What exactly have I done to earn His Highness’s disgust?!
Today… my hands tremble. Today… my heart aches. Why is it like this? I gave everything, yet I cannot receive even a trace of the love I desire. Why, heavens, must you give me such suffering? What did I do wrong…?
Faust, Faust, Faust…!!
Vivian had long resolved to become Faust’s wife and partner. If she lost that goal, then what meaning would her life hold?
Such agony tormented her, yet no matter what…
She could not bring herself to hate Faust.
And so… she could only hate herself.
She hated herself for failing to earn His Highness’s affection. Hated her own weakness and pitifulness… hated the face that seemed to disgust him.
Under such extreme hatred, Vivian donned a hood to conceal her “ugly face.”
She sealed away her excessive longing and possessiveness toward him deep within her heart.
Only in this way could Vivian behave normally by Faust’s side.
Only in this way could she endure the Prince of Qingxi’s distant, ambiguous control—pretending not to notice.
But when she learned of the selection ball for consorts, the jealousy and resentment within Vivian finally overwhelmed her.
She heard a voice from deep within her heart.
It sounded as though it belonged to another version of herself.
“Are you really going to remain indifferent like this?”
“I’ve been imprisoned by you for so long—haven’t you realized? I can make His Highness fall in love with us. He must belong to us. Faust must be ours.”
“At least for these three days… let me leave behind some beautiful memories.”
Everything that followed felt like a dream to Vivian, who watched it unfold as if from the outside.
And when the ball ended, she finally understood an even more cruel truth.
The same face… yet completely different outcomes.
“So that’s how it is… It’s simply that he doesn’t like me.”
“As long as it’s me… as long as it’s Vivian Roselin… it will never work!”
Because of this, all her helplessness and bitterness could only be buried as she rested her head against the prince’s shoulder, her voice trembling.
“Do you… hate me that much?”
…
“So, what you’re saying is that you have a split personality?”
After Vivian finished her soft explanation, Faust finally grasped the situation.
The pale golden-haired girl nodded lightly.
“Yes…”
The prince bluntly commented, “But that doesn’t really sound like a second personality in the strict sense. It sounds more like… a mask.”
Vivian’s ability to switch so fluidly did not resemble dissociative identity at all. It was more like a persona—a mask that allowed her to express her true inner desires.
“…”
The girl’s expression suddenly darkened.
Damn it, I shouldn’t have said that so directly.
Faust inwardly sensed trouble. Vivian let out a sigh and murmured softly,
“I’ll leave it to you…”
So she’s planning to put on the mask and escape again? Vivian, this version of you is truly… cowardly!
Faust hurriedly spoke, “Wait, Vivian, calm down—”
“There is no need to calm down. What I am doing now is the result of careful consideration. I will not regret it.”
Vivian—no, rather, “Cinderella”—curved her lips into a faint smile. She pressed a hand against Faust’s shoulder and helped the restrained Prince of Qingxi onto the soft couch.
Forced into close proximity, Faust could only face Cinderella directly.
Her delicate, graceful face was as beautiful as flowing moonlight. Her clear violet eyes shone like gemstones.
Her pale golden hair and striking figure perfectly matched Faust’s tastes.
“I must have been out of my mind…”
The prince licked his lips, sweat forming on his brow.
“How did I ever ignore such a breathtaking beauty before?”
With Faust’s notorious indulgence, how could he possibly have overlooked his childhood companion?
Not only had he felt no desire—he had even treated Vivian with cold indifference.
Such behavior was completely unlike him.
After thinking it through, there was only one explanation: the “Script of Fate” had been at work!
I’ve been too naïve… When did I start thinking I was only recently influenced by fate?
He had already stepped into the “script” ten years ago.
Faust’s mind raced. In mere moments, he pieced together the cause and effect, eager to explain everything to Vivian.
But just as he was about to speak, Mephistopheles’ voice echoed in his mind:
【Do not do this. Revealing fate to a witch is an unforgivable act of defying destiny. The protagonist chosen by supreme fate will never be allowed to escape it…】
Faust fell silent at once.
Cinderella rested her cheek lightly on her hand, smiling as she gazed at the Prince of Qingxi, shaking her head slowly.
“Please, continue whispering sweet words. I would be delighted to enjoy them.”
“But I am not like that foolish Vivian… an easy woman to deceive, one who would gladly accept even lies.”
The golden-haired, violet-eyed Cinderella leaned closer, her flawless cheek brushing against Faust’s. Her long, curved lashes fluttered, yet within those violet eyes, Faust caught sight of an intense, burning flame.
“It was you… you were the one who seduced her. Again and again. Over and over. Do you know that? She originally intended to seal those nights deep within her heart. But you… why did you give her such a mission?”
“So this is your fault. Everything… is your fault.”
At this point, Faust could only give a bitter smile.
“Could you not force yourself on me?”
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