Two weeks later, as I sat beside Noah on a flight to New York, I reminded myself that I would be a fool to get in touch with Brian while we were there. I'd be embarrassing myself, throwing myself at him, for goodness' sake. I had to hold on to some pride, didn't I? No, I just couldn't. After he'd sent Noah the computer, I hadn't heard a word from him. Noah said that they were exchanging e-mails, but I .didn't ask questions about the correspondence. I thought it was nice of Brian to stay in touch With Noah that way and told myself that my son's relationship with Brian could continue without me involvement. I should be grateful that Noah had Some adult-male influence in his life now, without hoping for more.
Brian was lost to me . I had to resign me heart to that fact. At least good things were happening in my writing career, I consoled herself. Just two short days ago my editor had called, so excited I could barely speak. My most recent novel published just a week ago, had received wonderful reviews. It had even been nominated for some award, given out by a mystery writers association. My publisher was eager to take advantage of all the good press. They wanted to promote me, to send me out on interviews and book signings. My editor, LiZ, made speedy arrangements for me to come to New York, to meet the marketing and publicity staff and discuss all their plans.
"Gosh, I'm terrified," I had confided to Maria right before I left her in charge of the store."What if they hate me?"
"Relax. They're going to love you," Maria promised me. "You know why?"
"Why? I asked, genuinely interested the answer.
"Because you're the real thing, honey pie. the genuine article. They think they have everything in New York City, she said, waving one hand in the air. But they don't have that."
I sort ot understood her. But not completely. But I didn't argue. Okay, I'm the real thing, I kept tellhng myself, The genuine article. Maybe someday Brian will see it that way, too. I considered, my thoughts wandering During the entire plane ride, while Noah read books and played a handheld video game, I debated the pros and cons of calling Brian. As they stood in line at the registration desk of our hotel. I felt no closer to a conciusion about the question.
Noah, however, bad a very clear opinion on the matter. While I filled out the registration in formation, Noah whispered, "Ask if there are any messages."
"Messages? Who are you expecting would call? I voiced the question and immediately realized answer. My stomach twisted in a giant knot. He hadn't told Brian about the trip...had he?
"Brian , of course," Noah answered. "Who else do we know in New York City?"
"Brian ? Noah, you didn't..did you? I took hold of his shoulders and forced him to look up at me.
"Of course I did,' Noah said innocently. "What's the big secret?I thought... well, I guess thought you'd be happy to see him again."
"It's not that," I admitted. I would be.. but.." I sighed, unable to finish my sentence. How in the world could I explain this to an eight-year-old? I could hardly understand it Myelf.
"Did you tell him why we were coming?" I asked carefully
Noah shrugged. "Not exactly. I just said you had to come on a business trip."
I felt relieved. For some reason my failure to disclose my writing career weighed heavily on my Conscience. I wanted to be the one to tell him about it. In my own way, when I got the chance.
Now it seemed unavoidable. As Noah had requested, I asked if there were any messages for us. There was one, but it wasn't from Brian. Just a message from my editor, confirming our dinner plans and telling me that a man named Mark Beckman from the publicity department would call to escort me to the restaurant this evening.
Well, I had a short reprieve from seeing Brian, at least, I thought as me and Noah headed for the elevators. A bellman had already gone up separately with our bags.
"Now, let's see, what floor is the room on again." I wondered aloud.
"Twenty-three," Noah answered.
"No, I don't think it was twenty-three," I replied, staring at my perfectly blank plastic room key. I didn't travel much and I wasn't used to room keys that looked like blank credit cards and didn't say the room number. I fumbled in my purse for the slip of paper with my room number, losing track of Noah for a moment When I looked up, Noah was racing away from me dashing across the lobby. "Hey, Brian ... I heard him call out. "Over here!"
I suddenly caught sight of Brian , walking through the lobby toward Noah. A brilliant smile lit his face as he grected my son. When they met, Noah just about launched himself into Brians arms. Brian laughed and swung him up in a huge hug. I took a deep breath. I'd forgotten how good-looking he was. If possible. He looked great heart-stoppingly handsome, navy-blue suit, white shirt and a striking red silk patterned tie.
Finally we stood face-to-face. I couldn't help but smile at him. "I was passing the hotel and wondered if you had arrived yet." Noah must have relayed our complete itinerary, I realized, the time their flight arived and their hotel.
"Here we are," I said simply.
"All checked in?" Brian inquired. He stared at me hungrily. As if he was about to take a bite, I thought.
"Uh-huh," I nodded. I stared back at him, feeling almost dizzy, as if I was in a dream.
"How was your flight? he inquired politely
"Just fine," I replied. If he started talking about the weather, I wouldn't be able to stop myself from screaming
"That's nice," he replied, still staring at me, his dark eyes shining. "Gee, you look great, Olivia , he added.
"Thank you." That's sweet of you to say. I felt myself blushing. But it was true. I did look good. Even after sitting in a plane for a few hours. I had found the perfect suit. Gray linen with a long skirt and formfitting jacket. Very sleek and sophisticated. I wore an antique pin with a pink opal on the lapel and small pearl earrings.
"I called last week, but Noah answer the call." He said .
"Am not aware of it." I said and looked at my son questioning, Naoh?"
"Sorry mom" it escaped my mind." That's was when you're discussion with Maria, I decided not to interrupt your discussions. "
"Don't be offended, Olivia, it was just a brif call , I was calling to tell you that I would like come and see you over something, but Noah told me that you people are coming to New York. So.... I decided we meet here. "
"Oh, what could that be." I looked at him and continue, hope Will and Faith were good? I asked wondered what will make him sound so serious
"No..no.. they're good , it just between you and me , but You need to settle down first. "Em.... Well...would you like to have a drink or a bite to eat?" He offered. "Can I take you both to dinner ?"