Ryan POV:-
I couldn't focus on anything, my mind always came to Rebecca, thinking whether she is alright or not, is she fine alone?
I couldn't leave her alone at home. I need someone to be with her in my absence.
She needs someone to be with her, to hold her close. I hope Mom doesn't piss her off. I should have left her at Marianne's place but my heart is not convinced by it.
And no matter how much I try I cannot shrug off this feeling of uneasiness.
“Gosh, this is the worst.” I muttered, noticing the person next to me thought I was talking to him and opened his mouth to speak.
“Hey-”
“I was not talking to you.” I replied coldly, sighing deeply, closing my eyes.
I hope someone will be by her side to tell her that he is here or she is here for her so that she can be at ease until I come and hold her.
I just cannot pay attention to anything but her. The thing which left me most dazzled was whether she is thinking about me, whether she's missing me like I am missing her or not?
I don't know when this feeling took over me and stirred my mind but it is somehow mesmerizing and I want to indulge myself more and more in it.
Before the flight took off, I quickly took out my phone and sent Rebecca a voice message.
“Hey, Rebecca, how are you? Are you alright? I hope you are missing me. I am too… My flight was about to-” I was about to send but stopped and deleted the text.
“Why did you delete it?”’ The next person to me asked.
‘Why can’t you mind your own business?’
“Surprise.” He replied, turning my head to the window, closing my eyes to feel my overflowing thoughts.
It doesn't matter how much I try to desolate myself from her, in the end, I cannot. I just want to be close with her.
What is this feeling? I never felt like that for her before, is this a simple liberation of her or not?
Holding my chest, an unknown emotion knocked upon my heart.
My feelings for her are just taking over my senses and I just cannot save myself from it. I want to be close with her, I want to hold her to tell her that I am here and no one else. I want her to be mine and mine alone.
‘I don't know whether she thinks about me the same way or not but I just cannot take it anymore.’
Maybe I should try to take our relationship to the next level so that she might be able to think about me the same way and we can think about our future.
But the problem is she still thinks that I still love Marianne and my heart is hers but it's not.
“Your phone is vibrating, you should put on flight mode now.” The guys said, interrupting my thoughts after the announcement.
“Oh, yeah.” I hummed before replying to Rebecca’s text, asking when I will return with- I am not sure when.
Oh Rebeccca, you are not even aware of the fact that my heart is not even mine anymore, it has become.. Hers.
How will I make her understand that I am not thinking about her anymore?
“Okay, I get it, I used to love her before but now I don't, why don't she understand that simple thing I am losing myself in her. That I have begun to feel things about her that I never thought I would.”
“What are-”
“She is just evoking strange sensations in me. And also pushing me away saying that I love her but I don't.”
“Why don't you get it? I don't love her anymore.”
“Man-”
"I love you, Rebecca!"
I realized that I said my thoughts aloud, muttering them under his breath and the people in the flight looked at me bewildered. I felt slightly embarrassed and turned my head away, clearing my throat.
“I guess you should say this to Rebecca, not us.” He said, chuckling a little at my little stunt of sharing my emotions unintentionally with him.
“Sorry, man. I.. just have a lot in my mind. I didn’t mean to bother you.” I apologized sincerely.
“Well, it does sound like a complicated situation.” He shrugged, nodding in agreement.
“It is.” I nodded, exhaling deeply, closing my eyes for a moment.
“I know I am a stranger but I would surely advise you to do something about it before it becomes a scar.” He advised me and I truly needed it.
“I will try.” I agreed with his words because this was truly happening to me.
Wait a minute. I.. Love you? You? Rebecca?
The most unwanted woman in my eyes, the woman I want to take my revenge upon, the woman who is the sister of the person I loved deeply, her who betrayed me?
How can I love her? No,No, No, I don't. I can't. I just want to become her salvation and save her, nothing else.
‘There's nothing and will never be.’ I sighed deeply and decided not to think about it anymore.
My heart seeks no one but her- Shut up! I'm not thinking about it.
“Hey man. Sorry to disturb you but ummm, can you help me?” I asked, turning my attention back to the guy next to me.
If I resided in my thoughts, I would go insane.
“Yeah, what is it?” He asked.
“Can you help me to divert my mind?” I asked expectantly.
“Why? Are your thoughts haunting you?” He chuckled, turning his head to me with an arched brow.
“You can say it.” I nodded in agreement.
“Feelings are always complicated, they twist your life into unforeseen turns.” He smirked emptily as if he understood my perspective.
“Yeah, they sure do.”
“And the lack of words would worsen the situation. You would soon realize it was too late to confess.” He sighed, chuckling empily.
“Why do I think you experienced it?” I asked, narrowing my eyes in perplexity.
“I remained silent for seven year. Silenced Temptation, one might call it or entangled love and I carried the silence on only to realize it was too late.” He hummed, chuckling to himself sadly.
“Why? What happened to her?” I asked, curious to know further.
“She got married to the man she loved and unfortunately that was not me.” He replied nonchalantly but the sting in his eyes was crystal.
“Was she your friend or something?”
“No, she was… Um.. My nothing.” He paused, unable to speak further and I realized I shouldn’t ask anymore, judging the expression on his face.
“I.. got married to the sister of the person I loved.” I told him vaguely, faintly earning a weird look from him.
“How was she your lover when you married her sister?” He asked, bewildered.
“She didn’t want to marry me so her sister volunteered to take her place and I didn’t know until at the wedding.” I sighed, recalling her black wedding dress.
“Why didn’t you break it off?” He asked, more confused now.
“I couldn’t. There was everyone and I didn't want to create an ordeal… I just did it on the spur of emotions, anger and all.” I breathed out in frustration.
“And now your emotions are changing… loving her? Now you love Rebecca?” He asked, furrowing his brows.
“I honestly don’t know but it truly intoxicated my mind.” I muttered, shaking my head.
“Don’t. Just accept it. Denial will only hurt.” He said, giving my shoulder an assuring squeeze when we reached our destination.
Humming, we both got out and I realized, I didn’t get his name.
“Man, listen.” I called, before leaving for him.
“Hmm?”
“I didn’t catch your name. What was it? I am Ryan Knight.” I asked, chuckling a little.
“Oh, You’re Ryan Knight? It was a pleasure to meet you. I have heard a lot about you.” He chuckled too, shaking hands with me.
“Thanks. What’s your name.” I asked, smiling earnestly at him.
With his hands resting in his pockets, he walked away before smirking at me, speaking the most unforeseen name.
“It’s Erich. Erich Black.”
My eyes widened in disbelief to not believe I shared a conversation with Erich Black himself. The leader of the fashion industry. The sky among stars
The man Marianne dreamed of working with him, she died to shoot for his campaign and I met him and shared in-depth talks with the man who is on top of the sky all models and designers desire.
“Ah, how small is this world?” I sighed.
Smiling emptily to myself, I shook my head and went home after my little conversation with Erich Black.
I went home and greeted mom and dad. Since I came without giving a notice they were surprised but delighted. I smiled and asked about Rebecca.
"By the way, where is Rebecca?" I asked.
"At her sister's place. Why do you ask? Let her live there and leave her." Mother scoffed.
"Mom." I sternly called her. She turned her head away as I left to meet Rebecca.