I paced around the sitting room after Mrs Jane called Robin up. I was a bit uneasy since I noticed the look on Mrs Jane’s face when she said she wanted to speak with Robin.
I glanced at the wall clock, it was over 30 minutes and they were still upstairs and talking. I heard Robin’s voice and I turned to look upstairs. I wondered what was going on. I could also hear a light sob, that was when I knew something was wrong so I slowly walked upstairs.
I wasn’t meant to eavesdrop, but I heard no choice, not when I saw Mrs Jane in tears and Robin in the same expression I saw him when Hinn Carlos had said those words to him.
I hide behind the pillar close to the stairs as I heard Mrs Jane tell Robin to forgive his father, tears brimmed in my eyes as I heard all the things Mrs Jane said and also what Robin said about his father, but what made me shocked was when Mrs Jane told Robin that she slept with his father against his father’s will.
I clasped my hands to my lips as my tears rolled down and I know it isn’t as much as the hurt Robin felt right now.
“I am sorry Robin, I let you hate your father all these while when I was the one you should hate, my love was truly a poison that was ruining not only my life but yours too, I am truly sorry Robin…” I heard Mrs Jane apologize in tears.
I pecked out through the pillar to look at Robin, he looked so broken, he looked worse and I just couldn’t do anything right now. I watched his lips open and then he shut them again and Mrs Jane stretched her hands to touch him but he backed away.
“Say something Robin, please say something…” Mrs Jane told him as she pressed her lips together watching Robin shake his head as he looked at her with the most dreadful look I have ever seen.
“Are you saying…” Robin shut and opened his eyes again. “Are you saying all that dad told me about you is all true?” Robin’s tears spilt from his eyes. “Please, tell me that you are a lying mom…” Robin’s voice came out hoarse and my eyes were blurred with tears.
Robin searched his mother’s eye but she was silent, he shook his head again. “I don’t want to believe you, mom,” Robin said in a whisper. “I love you so much and don’t want to believe in these lies, mom…” Robin looked down, holding his head with his two hands.
“Robin…”
“Why?!” Robin shouted and Mrs Jane jerked backwards. “I have lived with so much hate!” He touched his chest and bit down his lips. “Why do you have to tell me all these now?!” Robin screamed and then he leaned back on the rail and was suddenly silent.
Mrs Jane stretched her hands and retracted them back, she was scared of what Robin would do next and so was I.
Robin shut his eyes and opened them again as the look on his face was unfamiliar. He looked at Mrs Jane and shook his head. “Do you even love me?” He tilted his head to his side and gave her a pathetic look as Mrs Jane was all pale.
“All the court orders, all your pleas to hold me when I was young, to keep me by your side when I was seven, was it all in hopes that dad would still come back to you because I am here?” Robin asked and there was silence at Mrs Jane’s end.
“You said you got pregnant with me just to keep him with you, was that also why you wanted to keep me, all just as a tool to have him back to your side?” Robin asked again and Mrs Jane was silent.
Robin looked down as he sniffled and tears rolled down his cheek. “I have endured so much, I have thought so much about you, mom, everything I wished for was to be with you, everything I ever dreamt of was to be loved by you at least I thought so, but here you are, still saying the same thing, why….”
Robin exhaled sharply. “You only brought me to this world just to keep Benny with you,” Robin’s lips trembled. “I was a child born out of hate.” Robin turned around with crooked shoulders and tears in his eyes.
He started down the stairs and there he saw me standing by the pillar. He looked at me with sadness in his eyes. I could tell what he was thinking but I knew there was a pain in his heart.
“You heard it all, could you not say anything?” He asked me and I nodded. “But, could you at least give me a hug?” He asked me and I nodded as I embraced him and he hugged me back.
I glanced over to Mrs Jane, she was watching us in tears too, I don’t know why she won’t tell Robin that she also loved him, I don’t know the reason she didn’t say those words, I don’t think it was the truth, I don’t think it was all her fault either.
“It feels warm,” I heard Robin say softly. “I need some air, could you take me away from here?” Robin asked me and I looked over to Mrs Jane, she nodded to me and I nodded.
“Let’s go far away,” I told Robin and took his hands to mine as I led him out of the house after grabbing his car keys.
I helped him into the passenger seat and got into the driver’s seat. I started the car and drove out of the mansion.
Robin was silent, he was only staring out of the window and I couldn’t tell what was in his mind but I hoped it isn’t suicide, I didn’t know where far away was, but I just kept on driving, I didn’t ask where he wants me to go, I just drove in silence.
All that I have heard, if that was Robin’s past, if that was how life had been for him, then he wasn’t only a mess, he was a strong child to have passed through all that and remained strong if that was his past then, there was no one stronger than this child who has thought his life was a mess but still hung on to hope.
Why now? Why did Mrs Jane say all that to him? Why didn’t she say she loved him? Why did she break his heart even more? I looked over at Robin and the only thing I thought of was that this boy needs to be loved, more than any child in the world.