Ryan POV:-
There is an eerie silence in the house. It doesn't feel like home at all.
I missed Rebecca a lot and felt so heartbroken when I couldn't be able to tell her how much I love her and what her worth is; which is greater than any riches of heaven.
Even if I try, I can’t tell her how vast my love for her is. A pain inflicted on me and hurt me a lot to see the empty wall as no sound of Rebecca can be heard anywhere.
No smiles of hers reached my eyes. I want nothing from God but to bow in front of her.
I worship you too.
She is present in my very prayer but Dad plus the doctor's words are pushing me in turmoil. I have to let her go because I am her ravage. I am the cause of her despair.
I just don't know what I should do, I am lost in those bottomless pits of misery.
A tear rolled down my cheeks, I tried to forget her, to give consolation to my heart that I don't love her but no matter how much I try, the only answer I came up with is that; I love her.
“Was this devastation worth it? Is my decision to let her go right or wrong?” I put my hands in the air and looked at the ceiling aimlessly as Rebecca question stirred my mind,
"Do you love me?" ‘With every inch of my core.’
I inhaled deeply as silent tears streamed down my face. My heart hurt deeply. Overwhelmed by the feeling of grief, nothing helped me to calm this havoc.
I closed my eyes and tried to sleep but to no avail, without her presence, I cannot receive any solace. With no sleep bestowed upon me, I went to work.
As I was working, I was told that Marianne came to meet me. She entered my cabin and looked at me with a glint of anger in her hazel eyes.
"How long are you intending to hurt both yourself and Rebecca?" She asked. I raised an eyebrow as she continued,
"Why don't you get it?! She is crazy for you, she doesn't eat, doesn't talk and thinks properly. All the time, she has your name over her lips and you are pushing her away.” She snarled.
“For once Ryan, try to understand what she felt! Can't you see? She is dying without you. She loves you, you are her redemption!" She was on the verge of crying.
"Mari-Jane-Acca... Mari from Marianne, Jane, Acca from Rebecca.. That used to be our spell to dispel our fears and you took it away! The only name she chants is yours! You are hurting her!" She shouted.
I slammed my hands on the table and stood up and replied to her exasperated.
"Then what am I supposed to do?! All this happened because of me! It would be better if she is off with me."
"And what about the heart which resides in you? " she said in a broken voice, breaking into soft sobs.
"And what about the ravage which is given to us by each other's presence?" I whispered, sadly.
"It's you. You are pushing her away. Hold her for once and you will see she can overcome every obstacle with a smile as long as you hold her hand."
I stiffed and didn't reply and she continued,
"Please Ryan, give your relationship a last chance. Rebecca loves you a lot, you are her salvation, the reason for her smile. Her life has your name."
She tried to make me explain between her sobs. I closed my eyes as tears flowed down, I lost my strength as I fell back on my chair and Marianne left.
Showing me a tiny light of hope which I lost somewhere.
I desperately cling on to it to not push both of us into the abyss anymore. This will hurt both of us, it is far for us. We both need each other.
A sob escaped my lips. I put my hand over my face to muffle my cries. An intense pain shot through my core as I felt vulnerable and angry at myself.
‘I was lost in the delusion that she can be happy if she is not with me but in reality her happiness resides with me.’
You said it would be extremely hard but it’s worth a try. My absence was only making things worse anyways so let’s see what my presence could do.. One more time.
I went home in the evening and saw Cooper, my lawyer looking at me with a frown. I walked to him as he hand me the divorce papers and began to say,
"Mr Knight, think about it for the last time, sometimes the outcome of right is not happy. I can see you love your wife, the decision of divorce might not be good.
"I know, I have changed my mind.” I hummed.
"D-Divorce?"
An unstable voice came as my eyes widened and shock took over me. I shivered when Rebecca spoke her words in terror.
I gulped and turned to look at her. She took a step back and held the hem of her dress.
"Rebecca.. It's-"
I tried to explain but Rebecca whispered, "Ryan, Don't, Anything but this."
Her lips were quivering, she kept walking back. She lost her breath, tears brimmed in her eyes.
Cooper just lowered his head and left without saying anything. My lips began to tremble as I tilt my head, tears blurring my vision.
She held her hands out to me as I walked to her. She looked at me with a shattered look of betrayal and agony.
"Rebecca." I called her desperately, wanting to explain everything to her but the lump in my throat was enough for me to know that the only voice escaping my lips would be a sob.
A tear rolled down her cheeks, a sudden pain shot through both of our hearts as the silence crushed us.
She pulled her hands back to her chest and joined them together and fell on her knees in a begging manner.
My eyes widened when I saw her like this and I followed her action too.
She is not the only one who is bending before love. I am too. We both are powerless before our love.